the sacred lj covenant
Oct. 4th, 2002 12:51 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
fearlesstempAs I've mentioned, all car related events must be documented in this here LJ and so I must make mention of the fact that I was rear ended last night while on my way to a free preview of Tuck Everlasting (LUCKY! It was so good! It made me cry!). It was very dramatic! And completely not my fault. I handled the event with the usual amount grace and poise. Meaning, none at all.
When she first hit me, I looked in the rearview mirror and saw her sitting there with this awful look on her face, which I assumed was aimed at me, and so I got Righteously Angry! How dare she cop a tude when she was the one who hit MY CAR? The car in front of me stopped! I stopped! The most logical course of action for her would be to stop too! How DARE she look pissed off as if it's MY FAULT?
And I was going to be late meeting Anna to see Tuck Everlasting! *I* was the injured party here!
We pulled into spots next to each other in the mall and I hopped out of my car, all fueled by my anger and annoyance, insurance card in hand. And then she got out of her car.
Woman: (extremely upset) I am so, so sorry. I totally didn't see the car in front of you stop, I assumed they were going to keep going. I was arguing with my son, and I wasn't paying enough attention.
Me: (rage turning to understanding) Oh, it's ok, I completely understand.
Woman: (still upset) I'm so sorry. I really didn't think they'd stop!
Me: (understanding turning to distress that the woman is still upset) I know! Me either! I'm sorry.
Woman: Why are you apologizing? I hit you.
Me: (distress turning to embarrassment turning to spazz attack) I...don't know. I don't know! I'm, I don't know. It's ok. So, uh, what do I do now? Do I give you my insurance information or do we exchange or oh look! It's not so bad! Not at all! But I should get your information anyway, just in case. But I'm sure it will be fine. Fine! No worries!
Woman: Are you on something?
Me: I'm high on awkwardness, man.
Anyway. The car is fine (it is a tough little station wagon!) and I am fine (I am a tough Jess!), so it was a pretty good minor collision overall.
Tonight I had to stay at work until after eight to get some work done on this appellate brief and appendix thing. Dude. It's out of control. I'm a temp. I have no idea what I'm doing. And yet I'm responsible for things! I'm expected to Get Things Done! Today Mr. Boss had me call a DA about getting a plea bargain for some poor soul's traffic violation! Don't they REALIZE how clueless I am?
Anyway, I had to make sure I got work done so I could leave early tomorrow because...
I am very nervous! You can tell because I talk like Grover when I'm nervous and use contractions less frequently! As in, I am very nervous! I do not want to go to my interview for I will sound like a retard!
Oh well. See, the interview is for this local weekly newspaper for a job as a reporter. Which would be cool, because it would be a job where I would be paid to write and stuff. And also apparently the office is in this cool converted Victorian house, so there's another plus.
But! They want a two-year commitment! Two years is a long time! For me at least, since I am kind of flaky and am having second thoughts about committing to a cell phone plan.
Anyway, that's all jumping the gun, of course, since I'm nowhere near being offered the job. I must interview first! And therein lies the problem. I get nervous! When I get nervous, I lose what little gifts I possess when it comes to speaking and then all hell breaks loose.
I've been driving around for the past week or so answering imaginary interview questions while obsessively surfing radio stations for Like I Love You or the new Eminem song (Lose Yourself? Love it SO MUCH!). I'm always sure to ride with my window rolled up so as not to sound as insane as I truly am. With the windows up, they can just assume I am gettin' my groove on with Eve to Gangsta Lovin when, in fact, I am trying to coherently list my best and worst qualities.
Speaking of! Worst qualities! What if they ask me? My problem isn't that I don't have any -- I have plenty -- but they're so...unattractive to employers. I'm chronically late! I'm very disorganized! I'm not as assertive as I should be (some would say passive-aggressive)! Ooh, a chronically late disorganized passive-aggressive girl with a massive zit on her upper lip! We better snatch her up right quick!
Yes I do, of course, have The Obligatory Massive Zit. Very annoying. I will be joining countless teenaged girls worldwide praying for the Clear Skin Fairy to appear and smile upon me while I sleep.
Speaking of sleep, I must do that now.
When she first hit me, I looked in the rearview mirror and saw her sitting there with this awful look on her face, which I assumed was aimed at me, and so I got Righteously Angry! How dare she cop a tude when she was the one who hit MY CAR? The car in front of me stopped! I stopped! The most logical course of action for her would be to stop too! How DARE she look pissed off as if it's MY FAULT?
And I was going to be late meeting Anna to see Tuck Everlasting! *I* was the injured party here!
We pulled into spots next to each other in the mall and I hopped out of my car, all fueled by my anger and annoyance, insurance card in hand. And then she got out of her car.
Woman: (extremely upset) I am so, so sorry. I totally didn't see the car in front of you stop, I assumed they were going to keep going. I was arguing with my son, and I wasn't paying enough attention.
Me: (rage turning to understanding) Oh, it's ok, I completely understand.
Woman: (still upset) I'm so sorry. I really didn't think they'd stop!
Me: (understanding turning to distress that the woman is still upset) I know! Me either! I'm sorry.
Woman: Why are you apologizing? I hit you.
Me: (distress turning to embarrassment turning to spazz attack) I...don't know. I don't know! I'm, I don't know. It's ok. So, uh, what do I do now? Do I give you my insurance information or do we exchange or oh look! It's not so bad! Not at all! But I should get your information anyway, just in case. But I'm sure it will be fine. Fine! No worries!
Woman: Are you on something?
Me: I'm high on awkwardness, man.
Anyway. The car is fine (it is a tough little station wagon!) and I am fine (I am a tough Jess!), so it was a pretty good minor collision overall.
Tonight I had to stay at work until after eight to get some work done on this appellate brief and appendix thing. Dude. It's out of control. I'm a temp. I have no idea what I'm doing. And yet I'm responsible for things! I'm expected to Get Things Done! Today Mr. Boss had me call a DA about getting a plea bargain for some poor soul's traffic violation! Don't they REALIZE how clueless I am?
Anyway, I had to make sure I got work done so I could leave early tomorrow because...
I am very nervous! You can tell because I talk like Grover when I'm nervous and use contractions less frequently! As in, I am very nervous! I do not want to go to my interview for I will sound like a retard!
Oh well. See, the interview is for this local weekly newspaper for a job as a reporter. Which would be cool, because it would be a job where I would be paid to write and stuff. And also apparently the office is in this cool converted Victorian house, so there's another plus.
But! They want a two-year commitment! Two years is a long time! For me at least, since I am kind of flaky and am having second thoughts about committing to a cell phone plan.
Anyway, that's all jumping the gun, of course, since I'm nowhere near being offered the job. I must interview first! And therein lies the problem. I get nervous! When I get nervous, I lose what little gifts I possess when it comes to speaking and then all hell breaks loose.
I've been driving around for the past week or so answering imaginary interview questions while obsessively surfing radio stations for Like I Love You or the new Eminem song (Lose Yourself? Love it SO MUCH!). I'm always sure to ride with my window rolled up so as not to sound as insane as I truly am. With the windows up, they can just assume I am gettin' my groove on with Eve to Gangsta Lovin when, in fact, I am trying to coherently list my best and worst qualities.
Speaking of! Worst qualities! What if they ask me? My problem isn't that I don't have any -- I have plenty -- but they're so...unattractive to employers. I'm chronically late! I'm very disorganized! I'm not as assertive as I should be (some would say passive-aggressive)! Ooh, a chronically late disorganized passive-aggressive girl with a massive zit on her upper lip! We better snatch her up right quick!
Yes I do, of course, have The Obligatory Massive Zit. Very annoying. I will be joining countless teenaged girls worldwide praying for the Clear Skin Fairy to appear and smile upon me while I sleep.
Speaking of sleep, I must do that now.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
Good Luck!
Date: 2002-10-04 04:58 am (UTC)Re: Good Luck!
Date: 2002-10-04 10:09 pm (UTC)I think it could work. :)
no subject
Date: 2002-10-04 05:06 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2002-10-04 10:10 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2002-10-04 06:18 am (UTC)Did the lady really ask if you were on something?!
no subject
Date: 2002-10-04 10:11 pm (UTC)And no, that part of the conversation didn't really happen. I was exaggerating, as I've a tendency to do. Usually the last two or three lines of any dialog I type up from real life are exaggerations of what really happened, for my life is usually very boring and I need to spice it up. :)
Re:
Date: 2002-10-07 06:37 am (UTC)Yay! Good luck, Jess!
Date: 2002-10-04 06:25 am (UTC)By the way, talking like Grover will be agood thing at an interview, I think. You'll sound sophisticated! Good luck, (wo)man!
Re: Yay! Good luck, Jess!
Date: 2002-10-04 10:13 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2002-10-04 07:46 am (UTC)Sacred LJ covenant = fun.
"Me: I'm high on awkwardness, man." = priceless.
Do I sound like a Mastercard ad yet?
Good luck on the job interview. Take deep breaths and think of England (wha???), no, I mean calm!Lance, when you start feeling nervous.
no subject
Date: 2002-10-04 10:15 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2002-10-04 08:58 am (UTC)Stay calm, deep breaths, and remember the talk we had yesterday about Big Pictures and Perspective. ((hugs))
no subject
Date: 2002-10-04 10:16 pm (UTC)luck! luck! luck!
Date: 2002-10-04 09:14 am (UTC)Re: luck! luck! luck!
Date: 2002-10-04 10:26 pm (UTC)Thank you so much.