formerly a fearless temp

.i. interview anxiety

I have an interview tomorrow at the school where I taught last year, for the position I held last year, and I feel like this should be less stressful than most interviews but instead it's much more stressful. I keep trying to type out why that is so, but you can probably figure it out for yourself, and every time I try to write it up I end up with 87 rambling sentences.

.ii. expression theft

Instead, I am going to present you with this question: Is it just me, or is Daniel Craig's default James Bond expression in Casino Royale a modified Blue Steel? In case you are tragically unfamiliar with the film Zoolander, Blue Steel is male model Derek Zoolander's signature look in the movie Zoolander. I feel like I talked about this before in my LJ, but since I (personally) feel that one can never talk too much about the cinematic masterpiece that is Zoolander, I'm presenting it again.

Photographic evidence!



Daniel Craig as James Bond in Casino Royale





Derek Zoolander's Blue Steel






.iii. epistolic hillary

Has everyone seen the recent news story detailing a series of letters Hillary Clinton wrote while an undergraduate at Wellesley? A sample excerpt:

Befitting college students of any era, the letters are also self-absorbed and revelatory, missives from an unformed and vulnerable striver who had, in her own words, “not yet reconciled myself to the fate of not being the star.”

“Sunday was lethargic from the beginning as I wallowed in a morass of general and specific dislike and pity for most people but me especially,” Ms. Rodham reported in a letter postmarked Oct. 3, 1967. . . .

“Can you be a misanthrope and still love or enjoy some individuals?” Ms. Rodham wrote in an April 1967 letter. “How about a compassionate misanthrope?”

I ran a poll a while back in which I had people predict which Democrat was my candidate for '08 (it seems kind of ego-centric to me now that I did that, but whatevs, such is the corrupting power of poll-making), and I think I mentioned in the comments there but not directly in my LJ that my candidate for '08 is Hillary Clinton. I admire her a lot and think she's tremendously capable, but this was the first time I've felt a real rush of affection for her, or at least her-as-she-was. Her persona is now so tightly controlled and managed (to great effect, I think) that it's hard to imagine her ever moping around all day, too depressed to go to class, struggling with her Republican upbringing, etc. I know I'm predisposed to like her, but I still think things like this are interesting, when you're given a bit of a window into the personal history of a figure usually known only from a distance. There aren't a lot of personal details in the letters (not many that I've seen), but I think what's there (in the few excerpts quoted) is more interesting - the evolution of how she thought about herself, her role in the world.

I remember feeling this way when I tried to read the recent John Adams biography and got to the part of his diary excerpts as a young lawyer. In them, he detailed how he hadn't completed his to-do list, and how he should be accomplishing so much more and isn't, and how this made him feel worthless and lame. My words, not his, but the sentiment was pretty close to that. Which reminds me, I have to finish that biography. Or maybe read a romance novel. One or the other.

The internet is such a black hole. It swallows up my good intentions and academic drive to succeed. I came here for the specific purpose of digging up gossip about Genghis Khan, and yet somehow I find myself sitting here forty minutes later, typing up an LJ entry, after spending ten minutes desperately searching out General Hospital spoilers (after spending twenty minutes reading a variety of threads on TWoP, and checking my flist, and reading Dwight Schrute's blog), and do I have any new gossip about Genghis Khan? No! No, I do not!

Old gossip about Genghis Khan: I watched his A&E Biography yesterday, and it strongly implied that he and the head of another clan were an item. The Biography special didn't say it straight out, of course; Dramatic Intonation Guy said, "'Genghis and [Other Clan Leader] were said to be great friends, closer than brothers. They slept together in the same bed for one and a half years, making Genghis's wife jealous.' - The Secret History of the Mongols."

It ended like so many love stories do: With one taking over a good chunk of Eurasia, and the other being brought before him to be executed. Genghis, the old softy, had to leave the room while his old pal was being killed. A shocking show of sentimentality, considering he killed his brother over a fish when he was thirteen or so.

ENOUGH ABOUT GENGHIS KHAN!

I really think it's important that more people watch General Hospital and talk to me about how adorable Patrick and Robin are. I don't know why I find them so cute, but I do. I want them to bicker and fight viruses together and I want one of them to fall victim to the man-made mutant strain of encephalitis (these are all words that have often been used on GH recently), and I want the other to stand by all nervous, and wonder Why He/She Did Not Realize How Much He/She Mattered. Is that so much to ask? Is it? I'm being forced to watch Emily pant after Sonny! Give me something, GH! I've given you almost eleven years of uninterrupted viewing! Have you no reciprocal loyalty?

I've got three big assignments to finish tonight and I'm only just wrapping up the first. It is the longest, at least, so there's hope I'll get to bed before 1AM. One of these assignments relates to the Gettysburg Address (I have to lead a discussion in class tomorrow about how they're considering putting in a casino near the battlefield), and I came across the GA in my research and really, it's so incredible that you feel like you must force it on all you come across. So I'm posting it here, ten days after the Fourth (John Adams wouldn't mind about this, since he resented the whole July 4th bonanza because he thought it glorified Thomas Jefferson for something that was really the result of a lot of people's efforts, and that the real date to celebrate was May 15, when the delegates finally voted to declare independence, but that's neither here nor there).

The Gettysburg Address, given November 19, 1863 at the dedication of the Soldiers' National Cemetery:

Fourscore and seven years ago our fathers brought forth on this continent a new nation, conceived in liberty and dedicated to the proposition that all men are created equal.

Now we are engaged in a great civil war, testing whether that nation or any nation so conceived and so dedicated can long endure. We are met on a great battlefield of that war. We have come to dedicate a portion of that field as a final resting-place for those who here gave their lives that that nation might live. It is altogether fitting and proper that we should do this.

But, in a larger sense, we cannot dedicate, we cannot consecrate, we cannot hallow this ground. The brave men, living and dead who struggled here have consecrated it far above our poor power to add or detract. The world will little note nor long remember what we say here, but it can never forget what they did here. It is for us the living rather to be dedicated here to the unfinished work which they who fought here have thus far so nobly advanced. It is rather for us to be here dedicated to the great task remaining before us -- that from these honored dead we take increased devotion to that cause for which they gave the last full measure of devotion -- that we here highly resolve that these dead shall not have died in vain, that this nation under God shall have a new birth of freedom, and that government of the people, by the people, for the people shall not perish from the earth.

I have been back for a week and I keep meaning to write about my adventures in Europe, but instead I find myself watching General Hospital or reading about how Cory and Shawn were so totally in love on Boy Meets World or obsessing about Battlestar Galactica and NOTHING GETS DONE. There are other important things I'm supposed to be doing, but I lack focus! And drive! As usual!

Right now the thing I'm supposed to be doing but obviously am not is: revising my mother's resume. Pretend I put the accent there. In the next few days I'm supposed to help my brother with a cover letter for a summer internship, too. Why does my family have such faith in my abilities in this area? I've been out of college for three years and have no non-temp-agency-procured job to show for it! I can't get a job for myself! Why would I be able to get one for others?

I told this to my mother and she just waved me off, saying I was being ridiculous. This was one of the rare cases where I think I was being logical instead of ridiculous, but then I remembered that I did get called in for interviews a lot (you know, before the job rejection destroyed my spirit and I gave up the dream of being hired for a job I liked), so I mustn't be so bad at it. That prompted my mother to say, "That's right! You are good at this!" until I followed that up by saying that it must be my personality that's subpar, not my resume (again, pretend I put the accent there), which caused her to backtrack and be all, "No! It must have been the resume! Or! Something! Don't force me to acknowledge your persistent failure!"

Anyway. It DOESN'T MATTER because I got into the MAT program I was hoping to get into, so off to school I go in June! I'm not really going off anywhere, since I'll be commuting, and it's the college I went to for my B.A. (oh, I'm so adventurous!), so I won't even be exploring wild new territory, but - it's happening. I'm excited and also kind of scared. What if I hate it? What if the kids don't respond to me? What if I can't get up early?

Career Pros:

-Vacations and snow days
-Being paid to ramble about random historical facts I find interesting
-Possibly, someday, earning enough to pay for another car

Career Cons:

-Getting up early
-Scary adolescents

Three beats two! So I become a teacher.

(at least that's the plan for now)

A few more anecdotes for the There Are Only Thirty People In The Tri-City Area; They Just Use Trick Photography Learned From RNC Campaign Commercials To Get Money From the State File:

-The other day on the news the lead story was road rage - Driver A cut Driver B off; Driver A and B exchanged words; Driver B called her boyfriend; Driver B's boyfriend followed Driver A through traffic until Driver A stopped; Driver B's boyfriend stabbed Driver A's passenger SEVEN TIMES. The passenger is doing okay, miraculously enough, and was: the nephew of my mother's closest friend at work, the son of someone my uncle Kevin works with, and the nephew of one of my uncle Terry's oldest friends.

-Yesterday I went to get an oil change and when I gave them my name, the oil change guy asked if I was related to Jim MyLastName. I gave my traditional answer ("Probably, he's either my brother, father, grandfather, or second cousin once removed"), and found out that the guy used to do yard work for my grandfather. Random!

-Today I met with R. for a tutoring session, which went pretty well. His girlfriend was picking him up after, so I waited with him to say hi (we've talked on the phone a lot, but never met, and I was feeling friendly). When she pulled up, I introduced myself, and she asked if I was related to Jim MyLastName. Turns out my father represented her through a really tough divorce and helped her out. Random again!

I have to file another progress report for R. soon, which is stressing me out because we missed a bunch of sessions between my vacation, his overtime at work, and frequent foul weather. I'm sure it will be fine (he says he's getting good feedback at work), but I keep worrying that he'll get FIRED and end up LIVING ON THE STREETS all because I WENT TO EUROPE.

I gave him homework! Haphazardly drawn up, sloppily written, but homework nonetheless! And he kind of did the homework! Sort of!

Okay. Enough rambling from me. Oh, but before I go, a quick PSA for American Dreams, which I really really really don't want to be canceled! I read this on a message board and thought I'd pass it along, since I know there are other people out there as determined as I am to continue to get their regular J.J. fix:

To the Friends and Fans of "American Dreams" –

When I first wrote the pilot script for our show, I had no idea where the series might lead. (In fact, I had no idea we'd even make the pilot at all) But I knew that I wanted to create a show about families. A show about raising children. A show that might provide a safe place for families to sit and watch together. One that provokes discussion and provides an entertaining and emotional distraction. An hour to get your son off the Xbox, your daughter off her text-messaging, and you and your spouse away from the TIVO...

And "American Dreams" has become that show to so many of you. You, our friends and fans, are connected to the Pryors and the Walkers. You recognize these families that are struggling, but surviving in the difficult times of the 1960's. Little did I know that because of the tragedy of 9/11 and the war in Iraq, and because of the continued struggle for the rights of women and minorities in the workplace, that our period piece about the 60's would be one of the most relevant shows on television.

You embrace our fictional families with a flesh and blood connection that feels so very real. (Much in the same way I do.) You worried about JJ in Viet Nam. You get angry with Jack. You feel for Henry. You pray for Helen. You get annoyed with Patty. You hope the best for Meg. You're happy she has Roxanne. You empathize with these characters, as you and your family struggle to survive our own challenging time in history.

You love the actors and the writing. You love the music and the pop culture. You love the classic artists and today's artists re-interpreting the great songs of the 60's. You love the way the show makes you feel, while you're watching it. . . and for a while afterwards. How it makes you feel about the characters in the show, about the stories, and maybe even about your own family.

You love the same things about this show that I do. And when I read your comments on line, I'm moved by them. Influenced by them. Grateful that you're watching and writing and critiquing and commenting.

Your support has meant so much to me. And to our cast and crew.

Please keep it up. You can make a difference. Your emails and postcards are being heard and read. In fact, I recently printed the latest version of one of your on-line petitions, and plunked the 550 page document on the President of NBC's desk! So spread the word, have people add their names to that petition, as I will do it again some time in April.

You can help me keep this show on the air. Whether it's on Sundays or Wednesdays or whatever night NBC deems right...

And this week, if you're moved to do so, please send your emails after the show, (to AmericanDreams@nbcuni.com.) The folks at NBC are listening, they are looking to see this Thursday morning if we really do have the kind of organized fan support that I've been bragging about.

I hope you enjoy this Wednesday's Season Finale. I hope it breaks your heart a little bit. I hope it leaves you longing for more.

With gratitude,


Jonathan Prince