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tuesday morning ramblings
Aug. 24th, 2004 02:21 amI've been having very vivid dreams lately, which I realize upon further examination have actually been low-grade nightmares.
Dream One: I was driving a car full of people and took us all into a head-on collision at an intersection because I wasn't paying proper attention! I assumed a car was going to turn left or something and then it didn't, and I rammed into it. I completely forgot about the dream until the middle of the next day, when I was in the middle of driving my family all around Cape Cod. I was positive it was a premonition and terrified the whole time.
Dream Two: In this dream, I ran into this guy I had three awkward dates with and then blew off last year. We exchanged pleasantries and then I went into this cafe alone, where I ran into this other random guy who I'd never met before but instantly developed a crush on. And so I'm sitting there, talking with him about the awkward interaction with this other guy, about why I didn't like him, etc etc, and then Guy No. 1 comes in and sits down with Guy No. 2 and clearly they're best friends. It was so incredibly awkward, I wanted to DIE.
So apparently my greatest fears are car accidents and awkward social interaction. Sounds about right.
Speaking of the latter: My mother is trying to set me up with this guy. She has been for ages. "He's great!" she says. "Maureen -- not your aunt Maureen, my coworker Maureen, who was your aunt Kelly's best friend in high school? Well, her sister Margie works with this guy who's supposedly really great, and she thinks you and he would really get along!"
"But I've never met Margie," I said.
"I know," she says. "But Maureen told her all about you!"
"But I haven't talked to Maureen in years," I said. "I mean, I like her, but --"
"Oh, you're both single carbon-based life forms," my mother said. "It'll be fine! Also, he likes cats."
Why is it so weird for men to like cats? I must have seen some movie or TV show as a kid where a really weird guy had cats, because even though intellectually I know it shouldn't mean anything, it still puts me off a bit when a guy lists felines as a main interest.
And he does do this. Do you want to know how I know this? He wrote me an e-mail and said so, though he doesn't have any pets outside of one fish. Also, he's very devoted to the Catholic faith. Does he know I'm a heathen Catholic who hasn't gone to Confession in ages? Who hasn't gone to mass at all in forever? He might have gotten some inaccurate intel on me in that department.
Speaking of Catholicism: I keep feeling like I should reexamine my faith, or my belief system, or whatever, but it seems like the kind of endeavor that would take so much energy. And time. And also, once you figure out for sure what you think is right and wrong, you don't have nearly as much leeway with your own life choices, which isn't all that appealing. Right now I know that I believe certain things are right and certain things are wrong, and then there's that whole mess that the jury's out on. Maybe it's because I'm a Gemini that I'm so indecisive -- and speaking of the Zodiac, how strict is the church about the zodiac thing? If I really dig into the whole Catholic thing, am I allowed to read my horoscope and attribute my flakiness to my sign? Or would that be a thing of the past? Would I have to blame it on original sin or something?
It's kind of stunning how little I know about my religious background. People ask me questions about Catholicism -- like, what's up with all the saints? Or, explain that whole marriage/divorce/annulment thing again? I always end up sitting there, desperate, trying to stammer out some kind of answer, usually a mish-mash of stuff I've picked up from my years and years of religious ed and listening to my grandfather. And then I go home and ask my mom, who will give a smiliar answer to the one I gave, followed by, "I don't know, ask your father," who will give me a similar answer followed by, "I don't know, ask your mother."
One time my friend Anna asked if we were allowed to marry non-Christians in the church, and I double-checked with my Dad when I got home. He got all over-eager, saying things like, "Oh, you can marry ANYONE you like, Honeybunch, a Muslim even! We'll work it out!"
And then I had to explain, no, really, my friend asked me -- no, REALLY, a friend! No marriage on the horizon! Just want the official church policy!
Also, I didn't know whether to bestow or dock points for the Muslim comment. My father can occasionally sound like a modern-day, slightly-more-liberal Archie Bunker. He becomes less and less PC with age.
And before I go on and say something horridly un-PC myself about my Dad's crazy beliefs, I will end this entry here, and go back to watching X-Files reruns.
Dream One: I was driving a car full of people and took us all into a head-on collision at an intersection because I wasn't paying proper attention! I assumed a car was going to turn left or something and then it didn't, and I rammed into it. I completely forgot about the dream until the middle of the next day, when I was in the middle of driving my family all around Cape Cod. I was positive it was a premonition and terrified the whole time.
Dream Two: In this dream, I ran into this guy I had three awkward dates with and then blew off last year. We exchanged pleasantries and then I went into this cafe alone, where I ran into this other random guy who I'd never met before but instantly developed a crush on. And so I'm sitting there, talking with him about the awkward interaction with this other guy, about why I didn't like him, etc etc, and then Guy No. 1 comes in and sits down with Guy No. 2 and clearly they're best friends. It was so incredibly awkward, I wanted to DIE.
So apparently my greatest fears are car accidents and awkward social interaction. Sounds about right.
Speaking of the latter: My mother is trying to set me up with this guy. She has been for ages. "He's great!" she says. "Maureen -- not your aunt Maureen, my coworker Maureen, who was your aunt Kelly's best friend in high school? Well, her sister Margie works with this guy who's supposedly really great, and she thinks you and he would really get along!"
"But I've never met Margie," I said.
"I know," she says. "But Maureen told her all about you!"
"But I haven't talked to Maureen in years," I said. "I mean, I like her, but --"
"Oh, you're both single carbon-based life forms," my mother said. "It'll be fine! Also, he likes cats."
Why is it so weird for men to like cats? I must have seen some movie or TV show as a kid where a really weird guy had cats, because even though intellectually I know it shouldn't mean anything, it still puts me off a bit when a guy lists felines as a main interest.
And he does do this. Do you want to know how I know this? He wrote me an e-mail and said so, though he doesn't have any pets outside of one fish. Also, he's very devoted to the Catholic faith. Does he know I'm a heathen Catholic who hasn't gone to Confession in ages? Who hasn't gone to mass at all in forever? He might have gotten some inaccurate intel on me in that department.
Speaking of Catholicism: I keep feeling like I should reexamine my faith, or my belief system, or whatever, but it seems like the kind of endeavor that would take so much energy. And time. And also, once you figure out for sure what you think is right and wrong, you don't have nearly as much leeway with your own life choices, which isn't all that appealing. Right now I know that I believe certain things are right and certain things are wrong, and then there's that whole mess that the jury's out on. Maybe it's because I'm a Gemini that I'm so indecisive -- and speaking of the Zodiac, how strict is the church about the zodiac thing? If I really dig into the whole Catholic thing, am I allowed to read my horoscope and attribute my flakiness to my sign? Or would that be a thing of the past? Would I have to blame it on original sin or something?
It's kind of stunning how little I know about my religious background. People ask me questions about Catholicism -- like, what's up with all the saints? Or, explain that whole marriage/divorce/annulment thing again? I always end up sitting there, desperate, trying to stammer out some kind of answer, usually a mish-mash of stuff I've picked up from my years and years of religious ed and listening to my grandfather. And then I go home and ask my mom, who will give a smiliar answer to the one I gave, followed by, "I don't know, ask your father," who will give me a similar answer followed by, "I don't know, ask your mother."
One time my friend Anna asked if we were allowed to marry non-Christians in the church, and I double-checked with my Dad when I got home. He got all over-eager, saying things like, "Oh, you can marry ANYONE you like, Honeybunch, a Muslim even! We'll work it out!"
And then I had to explain, no, really, my friend asked me -- no, REALLY, a friend! No marriage on the horizon! Just want the official church policy!
Also, I didn't know whether to bestow or dock points for the Muslim comment. My father can occasionally sound like a modern-day, slightly-more-liberal Archie Bunker. He becomes less and less PC with age.
And before I go on and say something horridly un-PC myself about my Dad's crazy beliefs, I will end this entry here, and go back to watching X-Files reruns.
